Shopping on the front line!
by Ren'aiXhakumei
Summary: Sir Neko and Private Strawberry embark on a shopping trip in a closed shop! Filling up their 'tank' with food, and getting into sticky situations, they soon find themselves caught! Randomness, and a lot of laughs. How will this trip go for the Amuto pair?


**Katsura: Well I have no more chapters to do for Last Ten Minutes now, T.T So until I do the sequel, I have nothing to do but some one-shots!**

**Ikuto: One-shot freak.**

**Katsura: Exactly!**

**Amu: So this one-shot is totally random? And the idea of it came to you, how??**

**Katsura: I have no idea! I was just thinking of something to do and I suddenly thought of Ikuto and Amu roleplaying as army soldiers.**

**Ikuto: I'm the leader?**

**Amu: And i'm the Private?**

**Katsura: Yes. And i'm a war nurse :)**

**Ikuto/Amu: Riight. No need to tell us what to do next. Katsura Does not own Shugo Chara, any of it's characters or the army. o.o**

''You ready?'' Ikuto whispers, pressing his back to the shop wall.

Amu nods, and lowers her hat over her bangs.

''3, 2..1'' He whispers.

They both push a loose window open and climb into the closed store, heading straight for the trolleys.

''SHOTGUN!'' Amu squeels, jumping into a trolley and clutching the sides.

Ikuto laughs and grabs the handle, pushing it along the aisles.

''Weeeee! Come on boy push faster!'' Amu chants, pulling her knees up to her chin in the trolley.

''First up, the meat section!'' Ikuto grins, pushing the trolley round a corner at top speed.

When they reach the frozen meats, Amu leaps out of the trolley and begins inspecting the beef, chicken and bacon.

''Sir! The chicken nuggets here look yummy yum yum yums!'' Amu yells, turning around to Ikuto and saluting.

''Good work Private Strawberry! Now get those nuggests into the tank!''

''Tank? I thought it was a truck..'' Amu murmurs, gestering to the trolley.

Ikuto gleems proudly and leans on the trolley slightly.

''It was before it got upgraded. Now, Private Strawberry, let's get the meat section done and move on to the dairy!'' Ikuto bellows, clapping his hands together.

''H-hai Sir!'' Amu squeeks, saluting before throwing nuggets and other meat products into the 'tank'.

Amu then jumps into the trolley, careful to avoid the food in there.

Swerving round corners of the shop, they come to the dairy section, full with yogurts, cheeses and milks.

''Are you sure we wont get caught, Sir Neko?'' Amu questions, climbing out from the trolley and looking through milk cartons.

''Heh, no way. Us military men-'' Ikuto starts off.

Amu coughs.

''And women, have no need to fear capture. We are strong, intelligant and damn right sexy!'' Ikuto bellows, clenching his fists and punching air.

Amu smiles, and grabs a few bottles of milk.

''Hold it, let me drink a bit.'' Ikuto orders.

''H-hai..''

Amu passes him a carton, and Ikuto inspects the product, before opening it and sipping the milk.

He stands there for a while, swishing it around in his mouth, before spitting it onto the shop floor.

''Not fresh enough!'' He bellows, throwing the carton down the aisle, making the contents rush out and spill onto the dusty floor.

Amu stands there, dumbfounded at her leaders actions, and wondering if he is ok in the head.

''Get some more and lets proceed to the fruit and veg!'' He grins.

''Y-yes Sir Neko!'' She cries, saluting and grabbing an armful of dairy products and dropping them into the metal trolley.

''And by the way, I want you to push me now.'' He smirks, sitting in the trolley, avoiding the products.

Amu sighs, and uses all her might to get the wheels moving.

''Hi ho, hi ho, it's off to work we go, with a bucket and a spade and a hand grenade.'' Ikuto sings.

''S-sir! I think you got the lyrics wrong!'' She cries.

''Yes I know, I changed them to my liking.'' He grins.

Amu steers the trolley around the corner, and to a escalator.

Of course, the escalator is big enough for trolleys.

But one problem.

How do they turn it on?

''Sir! There is a problem with our plan! We need to work out how to turn on this contraption!'' Amu saluts.

Ikuto climbs from the trolley, and stands before the towering escalator.

''Hm...I see your point Private Strawberry. Well, best thing we can do is to just pull the tank up the escalator. You push and I pull.'' He orders.

Ikuto grabs the trolley, and pulls it up onto the escalator, while Amu pushes the other end.

They get it half way up the top, with each step making more noise then the last.

''Almost..there.'' Amu huffs.

Ikuto gives the trolley one last tug, making it reach the top of the escalator, and onto the second floor.

''Mission acomplished!'' Ikuto smirks.

Amu skips up the stairs of the escalator, and takes charge of the situation.

''Sir Neko. We are short on greens! We need them for fuel!'' She yells, pointing to the veg section.

''Your right, Private Strawberry. I now raise your rank to Lance Coporal!'' Ikuto gleems, tapping a carrot on each side of Amu's shoulders.

Tears form in Amu's eyes, and she goes all shiny eyed.

''Aww thanks. WOO YEAH I'M A LANCE COPORAL THINGY JIGGY!'' Amu screams, running to the veg.

Ikuto follows, and grabs a few greens.

While Amu isnt looking, he tries a bit of sweetcorn.

Ikutos face turns green, and he collapses onto the floor.

''Sir! What's wrong? Sir!'' Amu panics, shaking him on the floor.

Ikuto flops his hand down onto the floor, and his pointer finger points towards some sweetcorn on the floor.

''Sweetcorn? No Sir! You can't die! I thought I told you that you were allergic to sweetcorn!'' She cries, shaking him some more.

''I'm -cough- ok Coporal Strawberry. I will -cough- get through this.'' Ikuto huffs.

He tries to get up, but falls back down on the floor dramatically clutching his throat.

''NOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Sir! Don't die! Be right back i'll go get some milk from the tank!'' Amu cries, scrambling to her feet and rushing to the 'tank'.

After 5 minutes of faffing around and crying, Sir Neko and Coporal Strawberry are back on patrol and ready for some more food shopping on the front line.

Amu pushes Ikuto around in the trolley, and pats his head every so often, earning a purr or two in return.

They arrive at the sweet section, and Amu instantly goes beserk.

''SWEETIEEEESS!!'' She screams, jumping into a pile of sweets in a barrel.

''Coporal! What are you doing! Stop messing around!'' Ikuto yells, stomping over to the barrel.

Her pink haired head arises, and a pouty look forms on her features.

''But I was swimming in tooth ache lake.'' She pouts, leaning on the barrel, making it fall over, and the variety of small sweets come tumbling out.

She lays on the floor amongst the sweets, protesting.

''Come on Coporal Strawberry, get up.'' Ikuto persists.

''No..'' She replies sternly.

''Coporal..'' He orders through gritted teeth.

''I said no dammit! I want sweets and I want em now!'' She cries, having a fit on the floor.

''Stop acting like Yaya!!'' Ikuto yells, grabbing Amu by the waist and resting her on his hip like a mum with a baby.

Ikuto gets a lolly from a pot on the shelf, unwraps it and puts it in Amu's mouth.

''Arigatou..'' She murmurs, clinging onto Ikutos arms.

He sighs and continues finding stuff in the sweet section.

When he's done, he lets Amu down and searches through the bakery aisle.

They both scan through the shelves, picking things out and dropping it into the trolley, uh I mean tank.

''The store will be opening in two hours. Time to get going Sir.'' Amu says, nudging Ikuto.

He nods and speeds off towards the shops back entrance with Amu following not far behind.

Amu trips on her own two feet and lands on the floor with a thud.

''STOP! Stay where you are!'' A voice yells.

Ikuto twirls round to see a security guard standing over Amu.

''Amu!'' Ikuto calls from the other end of the aisle.

''Waa Ikuto this weirdo wont go away!!'' She screams.

''What? Weirdo!? Anyway. You guys are in alot of trouble being in the shop before opening hours!'' He yells, putting his torch back in his pocket.

''Ikuto! Go on without me! You wont make it if you don't escape now!'' Amu cries dramatically, reaching her hand out.

''No Amu! No! I will not leave you with the enemy!'' He yells back.

Ikuto makes a sign to Amu, with lots of gestures and finger movements.

Amu nods her head, before kicking the security guard in his 'baby factory', and crawling away before he lands on her.

She runs towards Ikuto and jumps into the trolley.

''Drive drive driiive!'' She calls.

Ikuto speeds down the remaining space in the aisle, through the back doors, down a ramp, through an alley, and away from sight.

They reach their apartment in a matter of minutes, with Amu in the 'tank' and Ikuto driving.

She hops out and pulls the trolley into the apartment.

''Mission acomplished, Sir. Now. Time for mission 12.'' Amu gleems, putting the trolley in the hallway.

''Good. What's the name of mission 12?'' Ikuto replies, clearly not knowing his own game plan.

''C-O-S-P-L-A-Y'' She whispers in his ear seductively, playing with a strand of his midnight locks.

Ikuto feels himself sweat, and melt under Amu's touch.

''O-oh yeah..Well. Let's ge to it!'' He replies shakily, carrying Amu bridal style up the stairs in into the realm of fun and games.

Ah, young love. Who needs Tadamu??

**Katsura: Really, who does need Tadamu.. -bleh-**

**Ikuto: I'm with you there.**

**Amu: And me :D**

**Tadagay: -appears from the gay closet-**

**Katsura: OMFG Tadagay stop growing gay mushrooms in the closet!**

**Tadagay: Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaa Hinamori-san! I thought you loved meee!**

**Amu: No.**

**Tadagay: ....fair enough. Hey Kairi..wanna see my mushrooms?**

**Everyone: o.o **

**Katsura: Kay then, enough of that..stuff..**

**If you click the green button and review, favourite, etc etc, you will get a cookie with your name on it!**

**It's true, the letters are made of smarties :3**

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